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A 67-year-old man was referred to our Befriending Scheme in February by his Social Prescriber. He lives on his own following the death of his wife 8 years ago. He has a son who visits occasionally, and a sister and brother who both live out of the area. He has poor mobility and a lung cancer diagnosis. He drinks and smokes and cannot drive due to blackouts. He has no support from outside agencies other than his carers. He is almost housebound, has expressed feelings of isolation and does not talk to anyone during the day.

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This gentleman has been very happy to chat to us about his life, family, work and current situation. He said that he ‘sees nobody’ and spoke about his financial difficulties and struggles to live alone and look after himself. He did not say he has a faith, but that he has ‘questions to ask upstairs’, particularly following his poor prognosis.

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He has been pleased that we visit and has welcomed us in. He has talked at length about his struggles and loneliness, and we have encouraged him. We have referred him to Age UK and Macmillan for financial support, respite care and palliative treatment. Sometimes we leave him with small gifts - thick, warm socks as he complains of feeling cold; a puzzle pack as he mentioned he enjoys these. After one visit we gave him some chocolate and a Bible verse postcard. When he saw the verse, he seemed moved and asked us many questions that he had about faith.

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The gentleman sadly died at the beginning of September. At one of our last visits to him he said, ‘Pray for my soul’, which we were able to do with him in his final weeks.

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This past year our theme in care homes - we currently visit 11 regularly - has been the ‘I Am’ statements of Jesus. For our service and activity session based on ‘I am the Vine’, we led singing, prayers and the story of Jesus turning water into wine. We emphasised how life comes through Jesus, who poured out his blood like wine, so that we can live in him forever. At the end of one session, I spoke to a lady living with dementia, and helped her with a craft activity. She said, ‘Do you believe something happens after we die, then?’ I answered, ‘Yes, I believe we will meet Jesus.’ Simple opportunities like these are so precious to catch with those who are at the very end of their lives.

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There are often signs of distress and pain in the room when we visit a care home, due to the nature of people’s ageing bodies and brains. In a city centre care home that we visit regularly, the carer who let us out after the session commented on how she felt our presence, really the presence of the Lord, had changed the atmosphere in the room and brought peace. This is a joy that we frequently witness.

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Catherine Tresham, ElderLink Manager